Sorry! Back in.

I am SO sorry I've been missing posts (See title)! I am really sorry - to both you and God.

I have a lot to talk about. The first - I was involved in the April 27 tornados in Alabama. Words can't really express the devastation really everywhere that this storm touched (as I'm sure you all have heard before), and I can say from firsthand experience that the repercussions are still being felt - hard. I thank God for sparing me and my family, and I am so, so sorry for anyone who has lost anything, and especially anyone, in these storms. For anyone who didn't personally experience this, or who haven't seen the devastation, the best way that I can explain its severity is to say that this is officially (as in, by the US government's say) a level 5 natural disaster - the same level as Katrina, the highest level possible.
I really don't have something to say for this in relation to God. The only thing I have than enabled me to come through this ordeal with my sanity in tact, though, was a firm belief that God doesn't let something happen unless there is a reason, a purpose, a good that comes out of it - and by that I in no way mean that the good is equal to the bad in a single instance, but that some measure of good - no matter how minuscule in connection the evil it comes from - does come from everything that happens. I don't believe that God would ever allow something to happen that had absolutely no good come of it happening.

Okay. That was depressing, and I'm truly sorry if I've offended or hurt anyone, or brought up something that you would have preferred left alone. I just felt I needed to share this.

I have no real transition to offer to this next bit of mews from my experiences, so here it goes without one: On May 21st, 2011, I was burned with radiator fluid at a car show. In the south, car shows are largely outdoors in parking lots, and cars can pull up at leave at different times throughout the show, so that a still-over-heated Corvette was there when I was. As I was walking past it, the radiator cap flew off, and a stream of radiator fluid hit my back, neck, and shoulders. At first, all I could do was scream, not only from the pain, but also from the sheer shock and confusion over what had happened. I had no idea what had happened, what had hit me, why I was hurting, why my father was so upset - and it scared me. Soon I was apologizing for it, for disrupting the show, for having been angry with my dad only moments before - for everything. Within seconds, though, the people at the show were racing toward me with water bottles, coolers of ice, and even a couple of jugs of water, which were poured onto my back rather slowly (as to avoid shock) to cool down and wash off the liquid, and to help ease the burning. I was also helped into a stranger's lawn chair under a canopy, to keep me from the sun, and comforted by complete strangers, telling me to try to slow down my breathing, telling me I had nothing to be sorry about, that I would be fine, that I was doing well. I still can't even think enough on how amazed and grateful I am for all of their help - I would later find out that it was the water and the sun-sheilding and the breathing advice that kept me from getting worse burns and from going into shock, respectively. Soon an ambulance arrived, and I found out that my sister, who was with me but hadn't been hurt, would have to stay behind alone if my father came with me - but I found out later that a nice woman from the show (another complete stranger) had stayed with her and helped her calm down (she was really scared about me) until my mother and other sister came to pick here up. While in the ambulance, I was no longer able to have the pain controlled by cold water, and the only thing that the EMTs could do was to poor warm saline on my back (which, yes, hurt, but still lessened the burning for a time). I managed to control my breathing by singing hymns in my head (which I have thanked my Music Minister for since) and was able to ask the EMT in the back with me about what might happen. I also found out that he was a Christian, and he prayed with me, for which I am so grateful. (sorry, I'm beginning to tear up a bit now - this is the first time since the accident that I've tried to fully recount the experience)
It took 20 minutes to get to the hospital (the only one in the city with a burn clinic was also one of the furthest away), and it had taken about 10-15 minutes for the ambulance to arrive at the show, so there was a considerable period in which I was burned and without painkillers (the only thing that can really be done for a fresh burn). The only thing I can really say about this time is that I hope none of you ever have to experience anything like it.
I was in the hospital for about 4 days. During that time, I was helped and encouraged by more people than I can remember or ever thank. But the best thing that happened while I was there is that I prayed with God about the entire thing, and realized through it that I was the best person to have been burned, being that I am of an age where I was more likely than not to bounce by quickly and successfully (which I am glad to report that I have), in that anyone much younger than me has an increased chance of further complications due to burns (namely, infections), as do people over the age of about 50. Furthermore, I was burned at the best place to be burned - the back. Had I been walking any slower, the stream of radiator fluid would've hit my face and chest - versus my being hit on my back and shoulders which is not only easier to clean as a wound, but is also significantly less painful and significantly less likely to become infected, or to lead to a serious infection. I was so lucky - yes LUCKY, in everything about my burn, and upon realizing this, I was so grateful that the stream had hit me and not anyone else at the show - the little children running around everywhere, the 50+ who were roaming the aisles to look, and especially any other member of my family - that would have killed me to see them hurt. By God revealing all this to me, He gave me the strength to come through this - and even quickly, much to the surprise of many of my nurses and doctors.
Even more importantly - I had asked God before this for a moment in which I had to rely on HIm, because I have been struggling once again with remaining faithful, and especially in really living for God, Honestly, even now i have trouble with this - instead spending all of my time on mindless things without purpose which, though entertaining, are devoid of meaning, and devoid of God - facebook gaming, tv, waiting all night for Pottermore (which, I am both proud and ashamed to say that I'm in now!). I knew though, that this was my test - my chance to rely in Him, and I am so grateful that He let me have this chance, no matter what. I love God, and now I have another story to tell, a secret to share, a moment in my life that I can point to and say that without a doubt God was with me. I am so grateful, and though I continue to struggle, I continue to march, and to care so much about what I can do for Him, even if I (unfortunately, but truthfully) ultimately don't. I still care that I don't, and I still *want* to do more, and I hope and pray that God continues to give me chances.

... Not really sure what day this is. Sorry, I'm not punctual like Princess Jasmine!

Yup - I told you I was bad at this.
BUT - I'm getting better. — yeah, that may be giving too much credit, but I'm back now, so that's ... something...

Anyway, if you read the last post, you know that I had a revival moment! YAY!!

But, if you've ever had a revival moment — or any other kind of spiritual high — then you know there's also the "getting back to 'reality'" moment. Which, of course, considering I've had a few weeks to get there, has already happened.
BUT - I want to know what any of you have to say about how to deal with fall backs, because I know (and I'm certain God knows — and absolutely positive that Jesus knows — considering His forty days in the desert and of temptation was right after his baptism and assertion from God, but I digress, and etc.) that these times are hard. They bring pain, they bring trouble, and they bring doubt and concern over the validity of your 'growth'. So, what do we do about it? Well, I'm not trained in this subject area, so I don't know. Any comments?

Anyway-

As far as I can tell (and as much as I'm trying to do) we :
1- Give thanks!!! This is a biggie. As far as thanksgiving goes, you should do what is both sincerely a thankful heart and act to God, and a Biblically sound offering to God in gratitude for the love He shows you, and for whatever He has done that brought you here (not to say, of course, that thanksgiving and offerings aren't to be given to God anyway)
2- keep on doing whatever we did before that got us there, because that's a pretty obvious place to start.
3- pray. Now this is one I have trouble with, but just the effort — if sincere — gets through, and it's not like God wouldn't know of your sincerity. Bonus: intercession of the Holy Spirit!! (provided you're a believer, of course.)
4- Tell Somebody, ANYBODY, *EVERYBODY* what God has done for you!! And honestly, that shouldn't be too hard, considering what all He's done for all of us! :)

Yeah - I'm making some big generalizations here, and I want to restate that these are not the words of an ordained, educated person on the subject. I SOOOOOOOO Strongly suggest that you ask for more information about this from your local pastor, youth minister, priest, etc. Furthermore, I suggest you ask GOD, because He knows better than anyone what pleases Him most.

God Bless, and leave comments if you want! Good night, and Happy November 7th!

Oh God, I cannot even thank You enough for this!
My feelings of - of loss, of loneliness, of doubt, You've taken it all away! How can I repay you?

My prayer with You, which had been so unreal, unfaithful- had been so superficial, is resotred, because You showed me- through Your word which I could never have - or rather, would never have really read on my own or studied on my own -Jeremiah 6-8, words of such hopelessness and admonition, and given me new life!

I can talk to You again- You've saved me, You've saved me!
Oh- I haven't felt this way in- in longer than I can rremember. I can't even type, I'm shaking so much from excitement, and I'm crying ters of gratitude, which I haven't dne since I was saved the first time, 10 years ago. Dear God, How You - how amazing You are! I can't even express it! What, what can I do to worship You? You've saved me, You've returned me to the grace I turned away from when I went on in search of worldly pleasures, in search of nothing but pleasing my self.

And here, You have restored and renewed my love of You, love I thought was gone from my heart! I love You more now than ever before, Lord God!

And not only this, but You've answered my prayers for assurance of Your love for me, of the reality of my salvation! Doubts and troubles I have had for years have melted away now! How could I possible express what this means to me? Lord, let me serve You, now and forever more! I love You, I love You, I love You!


I pray, Lord God, that anyone reading this will find the answers to their own troubles, their own doubts, and that You may both Save and Renew all those in need of either, or both!

Dear Lord, I have read about renewal, and prayed for renewal, and You are Fithful, and have answered my prayer!


To any readers: I'm sorry that this post is not truly directed towrd you, as most of them are, but I cannot possible contain my joy! I pray that all of you, and everyone may know this joy, this hope, this LIFE and LOVE!

SORRY!

Ok - yeah, this is bad. Sorry! I don't mean to keep these postings coming so late, so I am SO LEGITIMATELY SORRRY!

Anyway, I know that only two people have viewed so far (and thank you! :) ) but i do want to see what people have to say. MOstly about their Christian walk, but totally anything you want to say. Also, if anyone has something they want to talk about, OPEN FORUM!

So- of you have anything you want to say, have said, asked, or answered, I'll try my best. Please remember, though, that I'm just a college student, and I am BY NO MEANS saying I have all the answers! However, I'll make sure to get help if it's not something I think I can answer, and between all of us, I think this can work. :)


By the way- tangental (or, just completely random, but it does kinda go with the college mention!) note: Deep fried oreos RULE! Tailgating for me now = deep friend oreos! But please, don't make it a habit (and I'll try not to, as well), 'cause it's really only grease and sugar. But trust me- try it once (excepting of course if there's a medical need not to - though I think that I'm over-explainging this) because it tastes like funnel cake with an oreo creme center. which is awesome. infinitesimally so. yeah. (lol!)

Ok - coming back.

I don't even really remember what all I included in my first post - sorry. However, I do know this: God loves me. I just had a small talk with Him about it. And trust me, He loves you, too.

You see, I've been having problems recently with my prayers, in that I haven't really been praying. I find it far too easy to just forget about Him being there, and sometimes to forget about Him entirely. I get too caught up in my "life" here. College apparently does that to me.
It's bad. And I know it. And God knows it. But... I think God also knows I'm trying. I'm probably never gonna be perfect, and I know that I'm not now. But God loves me, and in accepting that, and accepting His help, God will also save me.

It's hard to admit stuff like this, you know? And, honestly, I don't love God back half as much as he loves me. And we both know that, too. I love a lot in this world, I hope for and strive for a lot in this world. And then, when it's late at night and I've slowed down from everything, I remember that I should be striving for Him, and working for His kingdom, His glory. And I'll make a promise to do better, and then I'll forget later - as in, whenever I wake up.

But- today I was on www.cbn.com and I started talking to God again. I love Him, maybe not with everything, but I do love Him. And I thank Him for that. :)

First Off - New Day (Yes, even at 11:08 pm!)

Ok. So. This is new-ish for me. So - we'll hope that that's not a problem. :)

*By the way- those cutesy little faces will probably come up a lot. I just think it's kind of adorable. :D (see?)

Alright, so here's some background information: I'm an 18 year old college student [no- I'm not saying where. Sorry - I just have these weird moments of -

11:11 !! Make a wish!

 - having these weird creeper moments of thinking of the worst-case-scenarios of what could happen if I do something, and saying where I am is definitely one of those things that sparks those things. If that makes sense.]. Ok - lost my place. Oh yeah - me. Sorry - I did warn you, though. Anyway. This will be about me, you, and God. I've been a Christian for 10 year or so now, and I've been having trouble recently. I know that that's not what people usually say after they tell you that they're a Christian - or, rather, that he/she is a Christian (I have grammar issues!) - but, I've been finding out that a lot of people I know in my church - and a few people I've never really met, but have talked to through alternative methods - have had similar problems to mine at about the same time in their lives, so I thought that it could be a good idea to put this up, and just kind of build up a rapport and a place to support each other.

Again - I'm not a perfect person, perfect Christian, perfect truster, perfect listener - I'm just not perfect. But, I don't claim to be, and I'm not trying to behave as though I am. I just... I really think that this would be good for all of us - to have "a close and harmonious relationship in which the people or groups concerned understand each other's feelings or ideas and communicate well" (the Mac dictionary's definition of rapport).


By the way - the reason that I finally did this today: I prayed with a prayer counselor today through the 700 Club. I recommend it if you need someone to pray for you, because the woman I talked to (whose name I unfortunately never got) helped me so much, and even said she had felt the same way at one point. The number is toll-free: 1-800-759-0700.


Anyway - I feel like this can help, and that God wants me to do it. So... here goes nothing! God bless you all, and - let's hope this works! :)